So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
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We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
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Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle