weddingsv make me drug and hornr
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
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