You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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