she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
