god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
