This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
