youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT