That's when you crack a 10am beer
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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