I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
