I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
