We won't sleep together?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
