Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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