tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
