we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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