I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina just clenched in fear
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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