On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
