that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
