the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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