I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
