there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
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