hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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