Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
