What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Did I show you my penis last night?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
