Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
