But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
