arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
