Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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