I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Randomize
