About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
