I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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