Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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