where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
That accounts for only three of the penises
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
