I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
