Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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