May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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