you have to choose: penises or morals?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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