I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize