Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
