hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
