...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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