We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
how drunk are you?
Several
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
