he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
