He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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