yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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