you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
