Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
