My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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