He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
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Kegs are great listeners.
They don't give much advice though.
I second that, I've been down that road before
Drink more beer! Then get laid. Repeat.
keg: " drink me you prick and go make bad decisions you won't remember"
Must live in da parish
In New Orleans the keg probably said go to Bourbon St., get shitfaced, pick up tranny, regret it, then repeat.