sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
