And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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