he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Randomize