you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
The air taste purple.
Randomize