I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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